I’m sitting outside my house eating breakfast in early fall sunshine, emotionally exhausted on my Friday. But enjoying a Switchfoot album a friend (Sancho) finally gently pestered me into listening to.
I’m sad and crushed because my regular work partner (Cody) moved on without me and didn’t want to stay friends outside work. And a really promising romantic interest (Más) moved on without me.
I’m in a dead end job with barely any energy for trying to get a better one. And it costs me so much energy to deal with the job that I haven’t been able to do as much with house upkeep as I’d like.
But. Another friend (Kristophe) just bought me Baldur’s Gate 3, I’d been wanting to play, and couldn’t afford it. He bought it pretty much just because he wanted to. Blindsided me. It’s downloading and will be waiting for me when I get home.
I’ve kept the email notification alongside the one from earlier this year when someone bought me Diablo 4. Because I kind of can’t believe someone would do that.
And I’m reading a good book series a friend (Prety) recommended and talking to him about it. And One Piece, a manga, same deal with Koopz.
My DMs on Discord have never been so busy. My emotions are a confusing mess of sadness, despair, joy, gratitude, and confusion.
Once upon a time I did 1-2 emotions at a time, and they were always all good or all bad. Mostly all bad. Then my life crashed, my toxic relationship ended, I unpoisoned my brain, and…
Is this what it’s like to have friends?
realisticautistic 